If I Could See for Just One Day

Here’s what I would do if I could see again. For one glorious summer day, I’d be a bleacher bum. And play Frisbee at Oak Street Beach.  And get impressed by Impressionists hanging around the Art Institute.  I might paint my bedroom purple.  And ride a sleek red bicycle.  And watch my big, black dog romp in the cool blue surf.

I’d venture into the unfamiliar: down to scuba dive, up in a glider.  I’d find peace in the familiar:   gaze upon the face of my beloved, catch the light in her laughing eyes and see the strength I hear in her voice.

I like to think that I’d be grateful for one day of vision.  I don’t want to resent it as a miserly expression of someone’s sense of fairness.  I’d prefer to remain gracious.

I’d set aside time to spy on myself. Watch how I do things and figure out how to do things better.  I’ve never seen me as a blind person.  I’m really curious what it looks like to be me, how I put my problem-solving skills to practice.

If I saw my blind self from a sighted perspective, how would I look?  Pathetic?  Persistent?  I live in a sighted world.  I’d like to know how other people see me.  Maybe I’d understand both sides better

I want to think that wishing is not a waste of time, that it does not mean that I am doing a lousy job of accepting life as it is, that I seek only to escape.  I refute the suggestion that to wish for something not likely to occur will only make me sad or bitter or both.

And when the clock strikes midnight, let me be grateful for what I have.  Let me not resent those who have what I lack.  Let me strive to make better that which I possess.  Let me find peace and bring that peace to others.

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6 Responses to If I Could See for Just One Day

  1. bethfinke says:

    Nicely written post. Afraid I’m an existentialist, though. Afraid that

    • bethfinke says:

      Oops, have been having trouble leaving comments using wordpress lately, wonder if others are running into these virtual barricades, too. What I meant to say above is that for me, wishing for something not likely to occur *does* make me sad. Or bitter. Or both. But hey, everybody is different and deals with things differently…

  2. Joan Juris says:

    I enjoyed reading your blog If I could see for one day. It was very thougtht provokin. It made me think of things I wold like to change for one day.

  3. Carl Dalka says:

    What you have is called insite. The very fact the you can see into yourself is something special.
    Can others learn from you? The answer is yes. The next question is harder to answer.
    Will a boy from a little town somewhere in the midwest find happiness amongst the tall buildings. the wide streeets of this fair city Or in other words can a losing baseball team sell tickets day after day. Athe answer seems to be – why not? Why not be grateful for what you have.
    Jeff you are still one of my heros. Sorry – I been away – I seem to have lost sight of what is important.
    Friends is the answer If you have a friend – he may pull you through.
    Carl D.

  4. sarahjmartin says:

    wow….was really moved by this and it has made me look at myself and how I deal with living with RP with a different light….thank you Jeff

  5. Jeff, you are making an important point: that your spirit must be kept healthy and alive during this process. At almost 97 and legally blind, I truly believe this is one of the most important parts to still living life to the fullest.

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