Category Archives: Guide Dogs

Fill My Eyes

Last night, in Dreamland, I addressed the Annual Meeting of the Arbuthnot Society, comprised of blank stares atop black suits, white shirts and red power ties. I pitched an idea which gained no traction: the notion I could string together … Continue reading

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The Man Who Walks His Dog to Wrigley Field

In the past half year, I’ve lost my wife, my brother and my dog.  I’ve wept with sorrow, then waxed philosophical.  I’ve put one foot in front of the other on the treadmill, then sat stock still staring at nothing.  … Continue reading

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We Talked It Over with Randy

This time last year, in the midst of the Polar Vortex, Randy submitted his letter of resignation as my Seeing Eye dog: Dear Jeff, we’ve been a team for nine years… and that’s a long time in dog years. We’ve … Continue reading

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The Curious Case of the Hungry Dog

You gonna eat that? You gonna eat that? You gonna eat that? I could eat that! —from a book of verse by a famous Labrador Retriever poet In an effort to understand my Black Lab’s obsession with food, I consulted … Continue reading

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Jimmy Kimmel’s Only Interview with Randy the Dog

Jimmy Kimmel:  [Applause and theme music fade]  Our next guest comes to us from the pages of the Jalapenos in the Oatmeal blog.  Ladies and gentlemen, please greet the star of that hit series, Randy the Dog!  [wild applause and … Continue reading

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I Don’t Ride with Animals

People who accompany a guide dog, or most any dog for that matter, learn that the dog gets the limelight.  I have learned this lesson in humility. I accept my role being Timmie to Lassie, Vanna White to Pat Sajak, … Continue reading

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The Scientific Method Applied to a Dog

I set out to test my theory that wherever in the backyard Randy peed, the grass died.  For my laboratory, I measured a five-foot square, enclosed it with treated four by fours and filled it with bark.  I based my … Continue reading

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Food Fight

I work in the 5500 block of Lincoln Avenue in Chicago.  During seasons when snow and ice recede, I stroll to and from work with my Seeing Eye dog, Randy. In the 5400 block of Lincoln Avenue is a bakery … Continue reading

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What’s Happening When It Isn’t

Here comes that blind guy with his guide dog and already I’m getting uptight.  I mean, I don’t know how to act around these special needs people.  Some put signs on their dogs—“I’m working.  Don’t feed me.  Don’t pet me. … Continue reading

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I Need To Learn Braille Better

We get on the elevator, Sherlock and me.  Sherlock is my guide dog.  We’re at the third floor of five.  We want to go down to the first floor.  The door slides shut.  Nothing happens.  I press the bottom button.  … Continue reading

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